Skip to main content

Caught Out!

Just been listening to the fabulous Dosecast from Hirsty, Danny and JoJo (http://www.galaxyyorkshire.co.uk/) and they're talking about a couple of lesbians getting caught "at it" in Hebden Bridge. Now as every right thinking man in the world knows, lesbians are great! They rule! I agree with Danny on the subject and when I assume my place as President of the New UK after the revolution, lesbians will recieve tax breaks.

Anyway, they did a phone-in on times you've been caught and it reminded me of a time I was very nearly caught out!

It was with my ex who lived in the country. She'd been away on holiday and so I went up to see her at her parents' house. After a spot of tea we went for a walk in the fields round the back of the village. One thing led to another and a bit of au-naturel was sampled!

So we went back to the house, she went upsatair to sort herself out before giving me a lift home and I went into the front room to chat to her dad. After a few minutes I got up to make a brew but noticed there was a new little mark on their nice white leather sofa. A little investigation revealed what the mark was. There was a lump of sheep shit in my hair...which had rubbed on the sofa.

A bit of cheeky cleaning with the elbow sorted it out and I don't think the parents were ever any the wiser....unless of course they're reading this...in which case it was all her fault!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

191022

Read some “positive thinking” Blinkist thing last night before bed in the hope that this morning I’d be a tsunami of energy. I wasn’t but I did take from it a couple of ideas about surrounding myself with joyful sights and sounds and so I listened to The Fall on my drive in. My immediate boss (1) isn’t around and so I took the positive placebo and got stuck into my ever growing work list. I’ve been playing around with a desire to relive the 90’s and blog about it trying to convince people, the wider universe, that the 80’s were shite and the 90’s is where it’s at. I’ve had a radio idea fermenting, now thinking about blogging to go hand in hand with it. With that in mind I went on to the official charts website and started to listen to every album that charted in the 90’s in order. Three weeks in, pleasantly surprised by Loop and Jungle Brothers. More thoughts formulated after tea and a bit of work. I will expand once I’ve properly got a plan. One of my best friends from uni is coming d

Testing my True Faith

On Friday morning we got word at "The Lodge" that George Michael was releasing a cover version of "True Faith" to raise money for Comic Relief. I must admit to taking the trademark Fatmancunian position of head shaking and mumbling at the revelation. This morning I heard it. Gobsmacked. My first reaction was to wonder whether Comic Relief had gone back to the good old days of Llallaneeneenoonoo and Hale And Pace by releasing a comedy record but, no. It would appear that this is a serious effort. It's like when you're "tired and emotional" and someone's given you a kiddie's Cyberman helmet to sing through and then slowed right down as if it might have sounded fairly normal once but has been applied to an iron maiden. It is without doubt the worst, most ill-concieved record I have ever heard. If I was Comic Relief I'm be annoyed beyond belief and demanding action from George Michael's management to remedy this appalling acti

How much do I want to pay for being a newsgeek?

There's a great little interview with Ally Ross from The Sun in today's Media Guardian. This bit of the article intrigued me.. "He doesn't get the same online feedback/debate/abuse as other papers' TV critics because his reviews – along with the columns of some of the newspaper's other big-name writers – are not on its website. I wanted to find out from the Sun why its best-known columnists are not online, and whether it is testing things out in preparation for an extension of the paywall, but no one at News International wanted to talk to me. Ross himself is remarkably unfussed about missing out on readers by not being online. He started in the industry before online news was popular and he leaves all that kind of thing to other people. "I trust they know what they're doing," he says." The Guardian like other news outlets have recently seems amazed by the decision by News International to put paywalls up for their online portfolio with